50 Shades of Greater Ideas

Glamorizing abuse is #notsexy.

This weekend, 50 Shades of Grey is being released. With a mediocre plot, shameless abuse of sexuality, and pathetic pulls to divert attention from said mediocre plot, this movie promises to flop. However, the filmmakers have done an excellent job of playing on people’s natural curiosity- sensual posters are plastered all over the place with the word “Curious?” Naturally we want to know what the hype is all about. There are so many eloquent writers who have done this issue justice, and I highly encourage you to read their commentary, linked at the bottom of this piece. Or you can just read the plot on Wikipedia [Warning: you will feel like you’re going to throw up. Yes, it really is that bad.]

The great news is that you don’t have to see this movie! Here are 50 wonderful, positive, and fun alternatives. I promise they will leave you feeling much happier and more fulfilled. This Valentine’s Day, let’s celebrate #reallove and #truelove.

50 alternatives to seeing 50 Shades of Grey:

1. Go for a run
2. Bake some cookies
3. Go to brunch
4. Go to a convalescent community and talk to members about how they found the love of their life (a la The Notebook)
5. Listen to an album from start to finish
6. Put your phone on airplane mode for a day
7. Barbecue on the beach!
8. Go camping! Pitch a tent, roast some mallows, talk about life 
9. Make something from your Pinterest craft board
10. See a different movie! (Paddington is supposed to be delightful)
11. Sushi night!
12. Go for a hike
13. Get addicted to Serial (And let me know if you’re #teamAdnan or #teamJay)
14. Leave an Amazon review for something that you really love
15. See a play
16. Go for a long bike ride!
17. Go to your favorite ice cream shop and try every flavor
18. Call your best friend from home and catch up
19. Go to a shelter and play with the puppies
20. Ice skate
21. Plan a picnic
22. Roadtrippppp
23. Have a movie series marathon. Highlights: HP & HSM
24. Go bowling
25. Play Netflix roulette- randomly find a show and watch it. Who knows? It may be your next binge!
26. Try a new restaurant
27. Challenge your friends to a game of flag football
28. Go shopping for a fab new outfit
29. Build a pillow fort                                         
30. Lie out in the sun and soak up some Vitamin D
31. Watch a chick flick
32. Call your parents/grandparents and talk to them about their love story. I promise that it will be awwwww-worthy
33. Write a letter to someone you don’t see very often
34. Stargaze                                                                                                       
35. Make a bucket list and check something off now!
36. Go on a real date
37. Sing
38. Play Boggle/Life/Pengaloo. Whatever board game floats your boat, bring together your friends and get competitive
39. Have a dance party
40. Volunteer- spread #reallove to people who need it!
41. Find a cozy spot and read a book                                                                                         
42. Write a letter for yourself to read in 2016.
43. Climb a tree
44. Get all dressed up and go out to a fancy dinner!
45. Practice yoga
46. Order in Thai food (Pad See Ewe + Yellow Curry +Chicken Sate = Great night)
47. Organize your closet. Nothing is more therapeutic/necessary.
48. Go to a sporting event- even better if it’s something that no one really goes to. Dress up and be super spirited!
49. Pray
50. Treat yourself! Whatever it is that makes you glow with happiness- do it. Celebrate your worth and know that #loveshouldnthurt

Happy V-Day! <3

Additional Resources:

50 Fast Facts about 50 Shades of Grey- Matt Fradd

50 Shades of Self-Loathing

Fifty Shades of Grey Glamorizes Sexual Abuse